Funerals Archives • White Rose Ceremonies

Civil or Christian Ceremony?

11 May 2015/in Celebrant /by Rebecca Waldron

I was a little surprised recently by a friend who said they “can’t relate to a Civil Ceremony” as they are a Christian. So many people don’t understand what a Civil Ceremony is. A religious ceremony is presided over by a priest of the religion involved and the service is mainly about giving thanks to a higher deity. A Humanist ceremony is presided over by a Humanist Celebrant who believes that life only exists when we live it and does not believe in anything spiritual, or life after death.

A Civil Ceremony takes into account the individual’s beliefs, whether those beliefs are quite religious or not religious at all. When we write scripts for weddings, funerals or naming ceremonies, we talk about what makes the people involved tick. Their qualities, their likes and dislikes, what’s important to them, what they truly strive or strived to be in life, the imprint they make or have left on other people’s hearts, the love they have been part of.

Am I a Christian? Yes! Do I go to church? No! Does that make me any less of a Christian? No! I am a vicar’s daughter but I strongly believe that we create our own form of Christianity through the way that we live our lives. Being honest, loving, welcoming, thoughtful, hard- working, giving – these are just some of the attributes that so many of us have. I have seen many people do their best to live their lives within a framework of traditional values and principles, with family and love being at the root of everything they do. Many of these people do not go to church yet it is obvious that they live a christian life.

So let’s get this clear, you can be a fully paid-up member of any religious organisation or have your own particular and singular beliefs yet still have a civil wedding, funeral or naming ceremony that meets your spiritual needs (whatever they are) and which particularly focusses on the person or people involved. Organised religion will provide comfort to those seeking interaction with like-minded people on a regular basis but you can get the same affirmation and sensation of togetherness at a line-dancing club – both are spiritually uplifting because of the people you are with, the music and the focus on one particular thing. Civil Ceremonies are all-inclusive regardless of your beliefs. The testimonials we receive reflect how happy people are with the services we provide as Civil Celebrants – take a look on the pages on our website.

Civil Ceremonies don’t discriminate and, please be assured, control of your own spiritual needs is still safe in your hands. Happiness and blessings to you all x

Funerals are Dead Serious – right?

12 December 2014/in Celebrant /by Rebecca Waldron

“You can’t do that at a Funeral” is a phrase I’ve heard too many times. It’s not surprising that people think that way. The common perception of a funeral service is that it is a sombre occasion when people mourn, cry, sing hymns and listen to a Minister read prayers before the coffin disappears into the fire or ground. But not at a Civil Funeral!

Now, I’m not saying that we dance in the aisles, although I have had Morris Dancers and Line Dancers at my services, but we do smile, laugh, clap and, sometimes, joke. The content of a Civil Funeral really does depend on the character of the person who has died. Of course it is a sad occasion too and people will cry. But, with a loving and relevant service it provides a time to say goodbye that is full of light and shade.

It is all about that person and not about a particular religious institution. You can light candles, have poems, music, readings and family tributes, standard bearers if the person who has died was in the military, flags on the coffins, even a slide show of photographs – whatever content is meaningful to the family. In some crematoria you can also have an audio recording or video recording of the service.

If the person who died had some religious beliefs then a Civil Celebrant can include hymns and prayers at the funeral, but if that person was very religious then, of course, a Minister is the right choice to lead the service.

The final part of a funeral service is known as the ‘Committal’. At a Crematorium you can choose to have the curtains left open or closed. Generally, in the UK, the coffin remains where it is, so there is no opening of doors, squeaking of wheels as the coffin moves and certainly no flames!

Some families choose to leave the curtains open so that they can touch the coffin before they leave or put single stem flowers on it, while other families prefer to have them closed which, in a sense, brings them closure.

It is our privilege to be able to lead these services and we work hard to make sure the service not only reflects the wishes of the person who died, but that it also brings some comfort to their family and friends.

I would like to finish with this blog with a good old-fashioned joke from Tommy Cooper, which was used at one of the funerals I conducted recently:

“I went to the funeral of a tennis player the other day. It was a great service……”

Confessions of a Celebrant

31 October 2014/in Celebrant /by Rebecca Waldron

What is a Civil Celebrant?

It’s our first year anniversary this month and what an incredible year it’s been. From not knowing what a Civil Celebrant was, to becoming one, to experiencing and being involved in the full range of events that happen in people’s lives – Weddings, Baby Namings and Funerals.

I am asked so often, what is a Civil Celebrant? Well, we have some fabulous experiences with couples who want their wedding ceremony to be somewhere different, such as on a working farm – think of haybales, bunting, the clink of lemonade bottles and cattle in the background; in fields or meadows – think wild flowers, sunshine, a gentle breeze, ribbons on chairs; or at beautiful formal venues – think of the dresses we buy!

We laugh, we cry, we clap, we hug, we cheer, we get stuck in mud with our wellington boots, blown by the wind, barked at by dogs or lost in country lanes trying to find the right field.

We write scripts for all the ceremonies we deliver so that they are unique and, each time we do, we are reminded how privileged we are to meet such amazing and lovely people and, what a great honour it is for us to be asked to lead the happy ceremonies or more sensitive funeral services for these families.

A Civil Celebrant is a person who conducts civil ceremonies that focus purely on the people involved and are not linked to any particular religion or other institutional standard. We are free to deliver the ceremony or service that the family want and are not limited with what we can say or do. We are also free to conduct a Baby Naming or Wedding Ceremony wherever we are asked to although, for obvious reasons, funerals must be conducted either in a cemetery or crematorium.

We come equipped with lots of experience, stories to share, creative ideas and a professional yet fun way of working with people.

So, what is a Civil Celebrant? It is absolutely the best job we have ever been involved in and we wouldn’t swap it for the world!

Follow our blog for more insights into the life of a Civil Celebrant.

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What is a Civil Celebrant?